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tomfuckinmison:

tomfuckinmison:

Brought my cousin with me to my parents house and now my dad’s making him vacuum the entire house because my cousin said it was a womans job to vacuum and clean

image

(via soup-and-sousaphone)

Source: tomfuckinmison
Text

ccal:

how do u relationship

(via guy)

Source: ccal
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jerkidiot:

wlovepierce:

jerkidiot:

sonnyforpresident:

jerkidiot:

jerkidiot:

IM A TEENAGER I WANNA BE DANGEROUS I WANNA DO SOMETHING CRAZY I WANNA GO STEAL A TRAFFIC LIGHT

REBELLION

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AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THOUGHT TRAFFIC LIGHTS WERE A LOT SMALLER

YOU THINK THAT’S BIG?? CHECK OUT THIS STOP SIGN I JUST GRABBED

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STOP STEALING ROAD NAVIGATIONAL ESSENTIALS.

NO

(via violinplayingraccoon)

Source: jerkidiot
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assbutt-in-the-garrison:

artificialimperialism:

myuncertainlife:

fandom-fox:

spoopyphilia:

did you know when you suddenly jerk awake while falling asleep, another version of you from a different timeline just died

This post fucked me up.

It’s actually because your heart rate decreased so quickly that your brain jerks you awake to make sure you’re still alive.

i dont know wHICH ONE IS WORSE

this happens to me like all the time, is that bad…?

(via violinplayingraccoon)

Source: dutchster
Text

naomster:

couple-of-dumbasses:

leviisacutelittleshit:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

beggars-opera:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD

easy there henry

whos henry what thef uck?

*faint laughter from Britian*

*history teachers crying*

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(via my-wayward-wolf)

Source: colourfulpantsandarainbowhat
Text

deodrant:

i dont understand how some fries can be longer than the average potato

(via violinplayingraccoon)

Source: rnerrychristmas
Quote

"

stop telling girls
that they’re not skinny enough

stop telling girls
that their feet are too large

stop telling girls
that their stomachs need to be flat

stop telling girls
that they should always cross their legs

stop telling girls
that they have too much muscle

stop telling girls
that a d cup is too large

stop telling girls
that their thighs are too fat

stop telling girls
to suck in their guts

stop telling girls
not to sit like a man

stop telling girls
that their fucking curls are too big

stop telling girls
that they can’t take up space
like a fucking man can
because
yes
they
fucking
can

"

Source: samsmindpalace
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samssamulet:

the last one though lol

(via immissingmoriarty)

Source: amroyounes
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